EVEN IF YOU WERE NOT A COMPLETE LOSER

 by John Grauerholz

 

If you, on a rainy, thundering night, ever dare to look in the mirror - then you, my dear reader, will see a complete failure gazing stupidly back at you. That slobbering, slack-jawed creature gawking from the glass is you. Even if your face were not completely hideous, your acquaintances would still despise & detest you. Even if you had undergone plastic surgery in your younger years, your body would now be just as horrific.

I can assure you that no matter what you might have done in your earlier days, you would still be just as worthless as you are tonight. Even if you did not end-up as a complete embarrassment to your parents, you still would have become just as much a wastrel. Even if you were not a total shame to your family, your presence will still be scorned. No matter how much you could have “bettered” yourself, the end-product would be wholly the same.

Even if you had graduated from a more prestigious college, even if you had found a higher-paying job, even if you had married a more attractive girl, your life right now would be just as miserable. Never forget that even if you made better choices in your past, you still would be suffering just as much. Even if you were a higher-status human being, your daily existence would be just as horrible.

Even if you had taken a different road in life, you would still have arrived at exactly the same dead end. Even if you had found a different path, you would have ended-up at precisely the same chasm.

Even if you were not quite such a loser, you would still be just as loathsome. You cannot escape your fate: you, dear reader, were destined to fail. Nothing could have been done about it. No matter how much you might slog & sweat to fill the void within, you soul will always remain just as empty.

 

CREDO

by John Grauerholz

I need no gods; I worship myself.   I need no church; my ego is powerful enough.   I need no faith; I am confident in myself.   I need no scriptures; my own presence is inspiration enough.  I need no savior; I can handle things myself.

I need no government; I can defend myself.   I need no laws; my inner desires are guidance enough.   I need no other people; I am complete in myself.   I need no love; I do not wish to diminish myself.

I am an individual – and that is enough.

PARABLE OF THE COMMUTER TRAIN

by John Grauerholz



 

Let me make this simple for you.  Maybe I need to make it easy for you.  Perhaps I have to reduce it to a parable in order for you to understand.  It is like this ….

You have timed it perfectly.  You have walked the selfsame streets so many times before that you have memorized every piece of broken pavement; every crack in the concrete has been etched into your consciousness.  You have intuition for each changing signal, and know how to pace yourself so that you always can maintain a green light.  You know that it will take you precisely 13 minutes to reach the train station.  You have committed the departure schedule to memory, so that you can avoid the crowds and catch the last train of the day.

Just as you are about to reach the halfway mark, a car slows and the driver asks you for directions. You wince because you realize that this type of personality just likes to talk.  You know exactly how to reach his cross-town destination, but realize that explaining the route might take a quite a lengthy process.  Time you don’t have.  If you stop and help the fellow find his address, you will miss your train.

Now, a conformist might insist that you should have left earlier – just in case you might happen upon some poor sap in need of your assistance.  But only a fool would want to spend a minute more in the sticky, slimy benches than bare minimum.  You don’t want to waste any more of your existence around other people than absolutely necessary.  Only an idiot would time something so badly that you end up waiting.

So you repeat the usual pretext in situations just like this.  You tell the lost motorist the obvious excuse: you horridly shout to the driver that you don’t know.  You say that you have no idea and just keep walking.  You lie so that you can get to your own objective unimpeded.  Being honest runs the risk that you might have to give lengthy apologies and even longer elucidations – and you can’t take the chance of such a delay.

In just this fashion, if you stop to help others in life, you will never reach your target.  If you are kind to a stranger, you will find yourself stranded.   Just as it is necessary to give some falsehood in order to keep to your timetable, it is absolutely vital to spread fabrications in order to keep on your own path in life.

Whenever other humans want something of you, things are never going to be to your advantage.  The moment somebody asks a favor, you need to have a good lie at the ready.  If someone speaks to you, it is always better to respond with some untruth no matter what they might happen to say.