Saturday, February 27, 2016


by Mr. Mean-Spirited

Aw, what’s the matter? Are you upset? Did you get offended by what I said? Did you get all bothered by what you were told? Did you get your feelings hurt?

Well, your feelings need to be hurt. You deserve to be insulted. You need to suffer, bub. You need to feel the pain.  

When I offend you, I am doing the Lord’s work. When I hurt your feelings, I make you realize just how unimportant you truly are. Offensive words are always accurate words. Offensive speech is invariably correct speech.

Do you think I disrespected you? Well, that’s right – I don’t respect you, and nor does anyone else. If you are a contemptible person, you are simply going to get a lot of contempt from other people. You are just human filth – and it is about time that you realize it. You are absolute scum, and it is about time that somebody told you what you really are. You are a loser, and you need to come to terms with it.

You have an unwarranted opinion of yourself. When you are offended, you see yourself for what you really are: worthless. When your feelings get hurt, you see the world as it truly is: inconsequential. You need to come to terms with just how insignificant you really are in the great cosmic scheme of things, and my offensive words are exactly what you need to hear.

Emotional pain occurs when actual facts do not match your inflated opinions. Maybe you simply aren’t as smart as you imagine yourself to be. Maybe you just aren’t as attractive as you would like. Maybe your own life isn’t as fulfilling as you suppose.

Being offended ultimately puts reality and your perception back into alignment. You should be grateful that someone has gone to the trouble of putting you in your place. There is a reason why getting insulted cuts you down to size. Having your feelings hurt is downright therapeutic.  

You need to look yourself in the mirror and see just what a disgusting piece of shit you really are. It is absolutely essential that you get your feelings hurt in this world.

You need to be offended – and you need it special.


  1. Dear Mr MM,
    "Maybe you simply aren’t as smart …Maybe you just aren’t as attractive …. Maybe your own life isn’t..."? How long are we going to deceive ourselves by using word “maybe”? How many more painful experiences and disappointments do we really need to validate our insignificance? Should not we become honest with ourselves and replace “maybe” with “definitely”?

  2. Mr. Mean, do you consider yourself the same sorry sack of shit the rest of us are?

    1. We are all victims of biology in this life. We are all insignificant entities in this universe. I am just as worthless as every other human being on this planet. My neighbor hates me just as much as I hate him – as he damn well should.

      I expect to be derided. My readers find me just as despicable as I consider them. My readers despise me just as much as I detest them.

      I am not some guru. I don’t have any special insight. I have nothing to teach anyone. I am just another disgusting asshole in this world.

  3. Exactly. We're all biological meat units programmed by DNA, bumbling around and serving no purpose. The best futility has to offer.

  4. You're Paulo Coelho's evil twin.

  5. Me? I'm just someone who hates everything.

  6. I hate everything, too. My comment was addressed to MMS. Sorry, lindseywagners!

  7. The great cosmic sheme of things renders you and I as insignificant scums and disgusting pieces of shit. Great idea. We need to spend 30-40 seconds together in the torture chamber of an efficient psycho. Then we will think otherwise.