Saturday, October 6, 2018


by John Grauerholz


Although I am now ashamed to admit it, I studied anthropology as a university student.  Back in my day, professors were inordinately fond of requiring long, essay-length responses on final exams.   I can still remember one question from all those years ago: “Are people from all cultures capable of feeling love?”  The answer, of course, is an emphatic “No.”

Not all people experience love.   Romance is something invented by particular civilizations – love is not something innate to the human species.  Most people on the planet are entirely incapable of feeling love.  Love is an “acquired taste,” and most of humanity has not gone through the cultural-imprinting to actually do any of that amorous acquisition.

Whether such strangers are mere hollowed-out husks of humanity is not something that would ever have been asked in an academic setting – but a close scrutiny of the inhabitants of any big city would one yield one conclusion: most entities are mere “rough drafts” of human beings.  Other people are not mentally “fleshed out.”  They are pretending to be Homo sapiens by trying to persuade you that they are feeling what you feel.

Think of other people as mere “rehearsals” of the human species.  Close to being actual humankind, but not quite there yet.  Still missing something.  Strangers are incapable of processing the same emotional range as you.  Other people might emulate, but they cannot emote.

Love is a cultural construct – but in most ethno-systems, romance does not exist because it is not fabricated by the cultural ethos.

Love is just a sort of cultural stage-show.   A lover is just performing a social role, but players from alien cultures will not have the right script.  Physical affection is just a form of acting – and those thespians from distant venues may not know how to give believable performances on stage.  There is a reason why pornography is so important in Western society – sex is a sort of theatrical expression – whether on done on video by paid professionals or done on a cellphone camera by enthusiastic amateurs, eroticism is merely a sort of drama.  Intimacy is an act that you perform in order to pass as a human being.  Think of romance as a spectacle that you must perform in order to be accepted as a normal human being in Western society

If someone from another culture might claim to have feelings for you, then the foreigner is just pretending in order to get something out of you.  After all, those sentiments do not exist in the alien’s original worldview, so whatever he might express in the new world will be completely insincere.  An outsider always tries to put something over on you.  A stranger’s sentiments will always cost you.

When someone from your own culture claims to feel affection for you, that suitor is just expressing social expectations – rather than experiencing any passion for you as a particular person.  When your all friends expect you to be in some romantic relationship, you oblige by coming up with proper romantic sentiments – the object of such sentiments is of no particular importance, and the intensity of your romantic sentiments is of no consequence.  It is societal expectation that creates the affair.  A public display of affection is just a way of acknowledging the social construction of adoration. Romance is just the ultimate expression of group conformity.  Love is just a socially-correct form of self-delusion.

I once believed in love, but I have come to the realization that emotions are just there to entrap you.  I would have resisted the idea that romance is an undesirable thing until I noticed a pattern in romance: every woman’s expression of affection is accompanied by a request for resources.  Her matrimonial emotions and her material expectations always came in tandem.   Her cocksucking is only performed to ensure your compliance.  She brings you to orgasm just to confirm your obedience.

No emotions are genuine, but some feelings are more convincing than others.  All romance is a sort of dramatic performance, but persuasive only to the most gullible among us.

Your sweetheart is only there in order to make sure that you remain properly socialized.  If some gal says that she loves you, you can never entirely believe the girl.  Falling in love is how you are manipulated by the social organism.  If you ever are unlucky enough to be around someone who “has feelings for you,” my best advice is to get away quick.


  1. Romantic love is a trap. And rooted in narcissism - look at Romeo and Juliette and how that ended. Someone I listen to stated - love is a choice and an action. And obviously not something to be grounded in emotion. I think there is some truth there.

  2. I would agree with you that romance is probably a social construct. I strongly suspect that men are much more prone to romantic delusions than women. If it was the other way around then every woman’s expression of affection would not have been accompanied by a request for resources.

  3. I know everyone knows it already but i still want to write it:

    Science says that the bonding between lovers is made with 1 or more hormones which binds the lovers onto each other, ideally long enough to reproduce. Just look that most people get kids in their 20's when their sexual drive is on the highest.
    Especially young and uneducated people are slaves to their nature therefore it is absurd to swear at people in africe that they make numerous children.